ELF Emmit and a New Plan

10:35am                                          Writing Practice                                   52°/Boise


I finished my spiral journal yesterday and decided not to start another one right away. I have this blog to type in and a new blog that needs posts, The Sweet Story of My Stuff, the Practice Happiness blog that now has the domain name pointed to it (I removed the hosting for the main site yesterday, it's now retired) and The Story in Your Face blog. I have things to post in all of them and I'll be able to get to them if I stop messing around with the handwritten journals for a while. Although I do love to sit and write with a pen, it's a lovely feeling.

I bought a new brain-training tool, an ELF Emmit, and I've been using it for several days now. Hard to tell yet if I'm getting any benefits but I'm using the concentration/focus track daily, sometimes twice, once with my morning writing and then in the evening when I'm watching TV. So that's at least 4 hours of training a day. I should be beginning to knuckle down soon. I've also been sleeping really well, although I woke up at 5am yesterday ready to get up but laid there and read a while first, got up at 7:30 and I was up and felt good all day. What I mean by good is non-tired; I had a really down day emotionally. I think I've been suffering from what feels like brain fatigue. I think of things I need to do but the effort to follow through slides off like duck water and I wander off. I'm feeling better in that way but a few more weeks will show me for sure if ELF is helping.

I have decided to move to Mexico in June. I'm tired of America these days, tired of politics, tired of racism and anger, tired of living in a state where the majority voted for and approve of that asshole president. The whole idea of that man sitting in the white house sickens me and now I can feel what so many felt about Obama being president for 8 years. Only I'm not racist, I can just recognize a total moron when I see and hear one. So I believe I'll pack up stuff for storage and wander off to Mexico for a while.

I've been visualizing myself being there and wondering what I would do with myself all day. I think I'll take my bike, although that's a long haul for Sybil to carry Daisy May on her ass the whole way. I would have to bring the bike into the motels we stop at and I would have to stay two nights on the road in Mexico in motels that are safe for my car. I have to figure out about insurance and banking before I truly commit and I need new tires on the car. Otherwise, with some effort in packing and purging and donating, I'm ready to get started.

Although one caveat: if I begin to feel better about staying here and can be productively working on writing and art and be willing to get out and meet people, I'll stay. That's why I bought the ELF Emmit, to see if my feelings might be part of a neuro-issue that can be corrected without moving. If April rolls around and I still have the urge to pack up and go, well then, I'll begin the process.

I talked to Stephanie about the possibility of her renting my house and we didn't get too far in the discussion last night. Olie would need a pet door installed and I'm not at all sure I want one of those cut into my back door. It's a custom door already because of the size and if something went wrong or a change needed to be made, I'd have to buy a whole new door and have it installed. Plus I know she would want new carpets in the bedrooms and a carport. That would cost big bucks and I need my money to take me to Mexico. Although I could add it to my Sears card financing at 4% interest and pay it off with monthly payments while I live cheap in Ajijic. But my biggest concern is, what if I need to come back? Where would I live? I couldn't move her out after she moves in, not until she was ready to move and gave notice. The benefits of having her here are that she would take excellent care of the place but the downside is I would have to commit this place to her for as long as she wants to stay.

It's a possibility that I could prearrange an agreement that if I needed a place to live, I could move into the back bedroom and continue to leave my stuff in storage until a new plan can be hatched. If we liked living together, we could just continue until one of us needs a change for whatever reason and then deal with it as it comes. We sure could live cheap that way! $450 a month each would cover everything. But Rocky would be with me and I don't know if she could tolerate living with a cat. Olie won't be around that much longer, which is why I'm reluctant to install a dog door. We'll have to have another talk as a plan unfolds but I'll wait a bit and see how I feel.

Yesterday was a bad day, I felt so disheartened. Today I'm much better, ready to go clean at the Vista building and get on with my life. And so I shall. Breakfast awaits me.